So, I’m suffering from a very sore throat and fever. I came home from work early and went straight to bed. Gabe asked me why I was sick as I was heading to bed. I told him that I didn’t know why I was sick but I had a sore throat.

Well, we’ve had dinner, watched a SpongeBob movie and done some other stuff when Gabe, my 5-year old son, comes up to me and asks, “Do you have a sexual problem in your throat?”

What the heck? What does a Mom say to that? Do you laugh? Do you cry? Do you wonder where in the heck he heard “sexual problem”? I asked him and should have guessed that he heard it from his imaginary brother.

For those of you who are wondering. I don’t have a sexual problem with my throat and no I’m not just in denial about it.

Five plus years ago, before our children were born, we embarked on a mission to improve the home we’d been enjoying for a year or two. Small improvements…painting the living room and the dining room. This is the bulk of our floor space on our main floor. They are two very large rooms with a large arched doorway between the two. So, we decided it would be best to paint them together in colors that we knew would compliment each other.

So, we bought ALL of the paint and got started in the living room. That was our first painting experience and consequently it took a lot longer than expected. We did everything by the book and I was probably a little too cautious. We also chose a deep red color for the living room, which took a few more coats than expected to even out…since we didn’t prime first. Lesson learned. So, nearly two weeks after we started the project we were done with the living room and it looked fabulous. It was exhausting though and we needed a break before we took on the dining room.

Well, pregnancy and our first born came along before we ever started the dining room. Then when he was old enough to deal with while painting…pregnancy and the second child came along.

So, five plus years later we dug the paint out of the basement and last weekend we began to finish the project we started many, many moons ago. Since then we had a little issue with a window unit air conditioner and we had some water damage on the ceiling that we were eager to cover.

So, my brother-in-law and family came over to help us out with the project last Sunday. We got started before they arrived with the first application of KILZ on the ceiling. Well that was the plan anyway. Soon after starting to apply, the textured ceiling starting peeling and flaking off all around us. Now, we never liked the texture, because it was a dust magnet that was impossible to clean but we certainly thought it would be easiest to paint over it and call it done. We realized that wasn’t going to be the case…so we promptly changed our plans. With family coming over to help we knew it wouldn’t be prudent to remove the texture Sunday, so instead we decided to go ahead and get the walls painted and tackle the ceiling later.

We did just that. We got the dining room and the hallway painted Sunday night last week. I had Monday off, so I spent Monday working on the trim and a faux finish on a few of the walls. It turned out lovely, except for the water damaged, pocky, icky looking ceiling.

So, this week, we took that project on. Mike and I, but mostly Mike, spent all day Saturday removing the ugly cottage cheese texture. The house is so full of dust, it is absolutely absurd. Today, we got two coats of KILZ on there and soon we will get the nice and nearly smooth ceiling painted with the tan color that matches the non-faux walls in the dining room and will also match the ceiling and trim in the living room, pulling both rooms together as originally planned.

So, some basic remodeling that was 5 years in the making will be done this week and I can get my house back together, because it is driving me crazy…but it is looking so good!

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The city health department has been called. Wish us luck on resolution.

On rare occasions, usually around Valentine’s Day, our anniversary, or your birthday, I’ll sit in front of our keyboard staring vacantly at a blank document on the monitor. I try to put together words that can adequately describe how I feel. Sometimes, I’ll get a paragraph or even two out. But invariably, I fail.

And I will again today.

But I’m going to try anyway.

It’s not enough to say that you are my best friend. But you are my best friend.

It’s not enough to say that in a thousand lifetimes, I couldn’t find a better mother for my children. But there is no better mother for my children.

My limited vocabulary doesn’t contain the words that would express my gratitude for all you do for our family and my appreciation and awe at the sacrifices you have made. But I am so very grateful for the struggle and sacrifice you make for our marriage and our family.

It’s not enough to say “I love you.”

But I’ll continue to sit in front of my blank document. I’ll continue to hammer away at the keyboard failing endlessly to find the words that are enough. Maybe someday I’ll get lucky. Maybe someday, I’ll find the words. But until then, just know…

I love you.

Thank you for being my best friend. Thank you for being such a wonderful mother to our children. Thank you for everything you do for our family.
Happy Mother’s Day, Jenifer.

Posted by Jen’s friend Gretchen:

First off – aren’t Jenifer’s babies BEAUTIFUL!!! I am just taken by their cuteness!

A response to the radio show that has inspired the future financial plan. My take is this: the best way to pay off debt is not to pay the “smallest” debt first, but rather, to pay the “highest interest rates” first. In fact, this will make the time you need to pay off all debt shorter and less expensive (because those high interest rates are a bitch that will leave you in never-ending debt/interest payment). Here is a simplified example. Lets say you have three credit cards with the following balances and interest rates:

Card 1) $1000 14.9% interest
Card 2) $1500 23% interest
Card 3) $5000 3% interest

You would pay your minimums (plus 20%) on Cards 1 and 3 and then you would pay the most you could on Card 2. Let’s say that the most you can pay per month is $200. Well, as the months go on, your minimum payment will get smaller, thus paying off more of the principle debt. When that debt is gone, you now have an “extra” $200 per month to pay off Card 1. You would then pay $200 per month on that card PLUS the amount you were already paying on that card. When that card is paid off, you then pay that amount you were paying PLUS the amount you were paying on Card 3 to card 3. You total interest, and thus the total amount you expend, will be LESS if you pay it this way. As it is better to hold onto debt at 3% than at 23%.

A note on why you pay the minimum plus 20% on the “other” cards while you focus on one. Your credit score is dependent on your timely payments, plus the amount you pay. If you only pay your minimums, it will effect your credit score negatively. If you pay “over” your minimum, it will reflect your credit score positively (which will also effect the interest rates you pay on all your debt.) In order for the credit card companies to recognize that you pay over your minimum, you must pay at least 20% over your minimum. To get this number, take your minimum payment due and multiply it by 1.2. For example, if your minimum payment is $100, then your mimimum payment would be (100 x 1.2) = $120 per month. This is only applicable to credit and charge cards.

Also, if you have a mortgage, check with your mortgage company to see if there is a penalty if you split your mortgage payment up into two payments per month. If your mortgage is due on the first of the month, it would work like this: You would pay 1/2 your March mortgage payment on Feb 15th and then you would pay the remainder due on March 1st. Because the interest on your mortgage compounds not only on principle but also on the interest due, you will have eliminated two weeks of that interest due mid-month, thereby applying more of your second payment toward principle. On a 30 year loan, you could essentially pay off your house about 5 years early paying this way. Don’t take that number of years as exact, as it’s just an estimate, but ultimately, you get the idea.

I can not recommend more to read Suze Orman’s books, particularly her “Ask Suze Financial Library” which is not available in stores, but can be found on the secondary market on ebay. I got a set for a friend on ebay for only $9.oo. My original set was gotten on a special offer on PBS or something… but it is seriously invaluable regarding financial matters.

Best to all during these difficult times!!!

Love to the Roberts ( :

It has been a long time coming and truthfully should have come much sooner, but we have a plan. We have accrued a lot of debt together. Some of it was unavoidable due to massive medical expenses. Some of it was frivolous and unneccessary. Well, it is time to fix this mess. We are taking an approach that Mike heard on a financial advice radio show called snowballing your debt. So, we take the easiest debt (smallest) to pay off and we get it paid off. For us that is our auto loan. We are are about $3K away from having that paid off. That is a $350 per month payment. So, the idea is we get that paid off and apply that $350 to the monthly payment for the next lowest debt. Then we keep doing that until we are debt free, with the exception of our mortgage.

Tomorrow we are making a big step toward making this happen…but it is a kind of scary step. We are shutting off the cable…everything except for the internet. This will cut our cable bill by about 75%. I must admit, while it is kind of scary…it is also kind of exciting to think that in a few years we could be debt free. I’d like to say that we will snowball this monthly amount to the first of our debt, but honestly I don’t think that is the case. We’ve truly been living beyond our means. This is the first step we are taking to live within our means. Even that feels good. For the first time in a few years, I’m really hopeful about our financial future.

So, can a 3 year old (almost 4 year old) be depressed? Gabe just hasn’t been himself lately. He could just be recovering. The entire family spent last weekend horribly sick with a violent stomach bug. Mike, Gabe and I all spent about 12 hours puking. Starting at 9:00 PM Friday night, Gabe was the first to lose his dinner. Mike and I followed suit. For the first 5 hours, Gabe and I laid in my bed, puking and heaving every 30 minutes. The poor kid didn’t know what hit him. Since Mike and I really hadn’t slept at all Friday night, when Saturday rolled around we just had to parent in 2-hour shifts, while the other slept. I think we all felt better Sunday, just sore and weak from vomitting and tired from the lack of sleep.

So, maybe he’s just still recovering, but this week, he just hasn’t seemed himself. Tonight we had his favorite dinner (pirate food) and he wouldn’t eat anything. He seems lethargic and kind of sad.

I worry that he could be ill, but Mike says seem fine during the day for the most part. Mike thinks he just has some “after the holiday” blues. Is that possible for a 3 year old?